It's easy for a father living apart to fall into pessimism. The child is far away, the ex-wife is plotting, and money is tight. But research shows that optimism is the father's main weapon in the fight for healthy relationships with his children. We tell you how a positive attitude affects children now and in 20 years.Optimism as a magnetWhen a father doesn't complain on the phone about life, doesn't criticize the mother, and tells his week with a smile, the child is drawn to him. A ten-year-old child is not interested in disputes and alimony. He wants to see his father strong and cheerful. An optimistic dad gives a sense of stability.Impact on self-esteemChildren of divorced parents often blame themselves: "Dad left because I'm bad." The father's optimism ("I'm glad we can spend time together," "You can do it") breaks this fear. The child grows up with the feeling that he is valued and loved regardless of the family structure.Impact on future relationshipsChildren who see an optimistic dad in front of them, even if he lives separately, adopt a model of positive attitude towards difficulties. When they grow up, they are not afraid to create families, do not expect a kick in the back from a partner. The father's optimism heals generational wounds.How to maintain optimism when everything is badDon't lie, but shift the focus: "Yes, Mom upset me, but it has nothing to do with you." Find small joys in communication: "Today we fixed the bike together." Praise yourself for your efforts, even if they are not appreciated.